wonderful pages of the Westerners

en français

Cochonfucius


Cochonfucius respectfully asked the priest from Eastern Hill about the marvelous accomplishments of the Westerners.

The priest said: I just made up a list of examples. There is one for each of the signs in their curious writing, of which there are only twenty-six. Please listen:


Acronym      Westerners think in acronyms,


Bib      drown in booze


Caes      and resent the heavy Chains of Freedom.


Drak      They cross the Ocean in drakkars,


Euro      they learn europanto,


Fou      and swear by Michel Foucault.


Graf      Instead of concepts, they have graffiti,


Haï      they import songs from Haïti.


Inc      They dream of the Unknowable with Ibn al-Arabî.


Jet      They play with an artificial jester,


Kant      or go kantian.


Lep      When they learn weird lexemes,


Mot      they teach them to Megahal.


Nord      Basking in Northern Light,


Ob      they find it oblique.


Prot      If they hear psalms,


Quot      they mis- quote them.


Rob      They get up robotically


Sem      and lie down semiotically.


Tourne      As clever as Thomson and Thompson,


Ur      they thrive on urinol.


Vol      They shoot at platypuses in vain.


Wi      They are taught by Wilks,


iX      but they learn from weXler.


Yy      They ignore Yang and Yin,


Z      so they cannot keep from Zoning."





"I am comforted by that, said the Master. Their way of life is not likely to propagate."